I WANT TO EAT A NUT OF LAERMA!

This article in The Hill, the Congressional paper, about how Bloggers will never replace Rush Limbaugh is frankly just silly. I've never read a blog that even remotely pretends that it has the same amount of influence as Rush Limbaugh... I read blogs the most while I'm listening to Rush over my computer speakers (since I can't pick him up too well on the radio in Montreal); for me, Glenn "Insta Pundit" Reynolds and Little Green Footballs are supplements to Rush, something to keep my eyes busy while my ears are occupied. Claiming that the bloggers want to replace Rush is frankly about as silly to me as TTI's infamous "Johnny Turbo" series of advertisements for the flailing Turbo Duo (Turbografx 16 + CD rom drive) video game system wherein they claimed that Sega (using the ingenious pseudonym "FEKA" to avoid legal trouble) was going around claiming that the (underrated) Sega CD system was the first CD system when the CD drive for the TurboGrafx 16 had been around for two years prior. Except... Sega never really said that (and, in any event... so what if the TG-CD/Duo had been around first? Make the point that the Sega CD system isn't an improvement over your own system... don't make straw men. Not that this has anything to do with my subject, I just wanted to bring up the "Johhny Turbo" ads at some point because they were so unintentionally hilarious!).

I'm not a narcissist; I know there's zero chance he's talking about my blog, since I'm no Glenn Reynolds, and also since this is a Canadian blog (but written by a Canadian who would always vote Republican, should I ever get the right to vote in American elections, barring a major shift to the left in the party). But I feel like seeing how the four main points the guy makes about blogs are relevant to mine.

First, most bloggers don�t match what Rush calls �show prep.� Rush is almost always armed for his shows with reams of data and analysis from a wide variety of news and information sources. His commentaries indicate that he has actually read his sources, thought about their meaning, and prepared his own in-depth analyses before trying to persuade audience members during his three on-air hours each day.

By comparison, many bloggers� preparations for their stream-of-consciousness commentaries seem limited to reading the ruminations of other bloggers and scanning Internet news. Because some bloggers, even prominent ones, spend so much time writing throughout the entire day, they don�t research their own ideas well enough to be persuasive.

Actually, sometimes it is "on the spot" streams of consciousness, but I do put a lot of thought into some of the things I post... sometimes I write them out not all at once but over time in Word or a simple text window before I post them. Sometimes I think about them so much, I never get around to writng them because my thoughts get too complicated for me to convey efficiently.

Second, Limbaugh is a master of production technique. Rush started in the radio business as a record-spinning disc jockey and understands the value of using punchy �bumper music� to open his segments, for example. Though Rush cares most about the message, he understands that the packaging is essential to the communication process.

By comparison, most bloggers seem oblivious to the production details that might polish their communication efforts. Few seem to care about the principles of effective Web design. Some even seem to consider the primitive style of their blogs a badge of honor.

Well, you know, the main reason this doesn't look as spiffy as Little Green Footballs is that... they're professional Web designers and I'm... not, and, anyhow, I don't have my own dedicated server and I can't afford the premium version of BlogSpot that lets you store images. I don't really consider the look of this page to be a "badge of honour" (heh... Canadian spelling), but I'm not that bothered by the Utilitarian look... at least it's quick to load even on the smallest modem.

Third, Limbaugh understands that entertainment value is essential to building a mass audience for political communication. His use of highly produced song parodies and other irreverent spoofs keeps a segment of his audience entertained that would desert him if he were �serious� 100 percent of the time. Some bloggers use humor effectively to punctuate their commentaries; few exhibit Limbaugh�s comedic skill, timing and wit.

I certainly hope some people out there think this web page has some entertainment value... I'll even take "unintentional". Well, I like to think I'm funny. Everything that sounds like an opinion on this page is my actual opinion, though I do admit that sometimes I exaggerate for comedic effect. Obviously, some of what he's saying here isn't too relavant to this particular blog since I never had any intention of being the next Glenn Reynolds... I always intended this to be roughly one-third political/current affairs (but only things I feel like commenting on), one-third related to movies and other entertainment (but only entertainment things that interest me... I write nothing on celebrity couples or most current popular music because I have zero interest in that sort of thing), and one-third on just my life, mainly if anyone from my past is searching for information on "Steve Brandon" (Macdonald High, Class of '92) using Google. I know I'm probably not as funny as Rush, but he gets the big bucks and I don't. I'm not too sure how one would determine the quality of my comedic timing through just words, though some people have audio blogs, where that would be a factor?

Fourth, Limbaugh builds bonds with his audience. He provides enough details about his personal life that loyal listeners know something about his parents, brother, wife, their cats, his golf game, his diet, his hearing problems, etc. Those revelations allow listeners to have a �friendship� relationship with Rush that solidifies their place in his daily audience. Though some nonpolitical bloggers write much about their personal lives, the most influential political bloggers reveal few intimate details about their personal lives, making it more difficult for their readers to bond with them.

I think if you read this blog enough, you'd get a good idea as to what I'm like since I do talk about myself plenty, but, like I said, I'm not Glenn Reynolds and this ain't a purely political blog. Some things, like why I didn't blog much for over two months, I can't quite talk about, but only because there are other people involved who would not like it if I talk about them too much.

Yeah, all I can say is I'm no Rush Limbaugh, and I don't even think I'm a Glenn Reynolds... Rush or Glenn would have a better idea how to end a piece like this than I would.

posted by Steve Brandon @ 6:42 AM